In Parts 1 thru 4 of this five part series I explained the psychological problem many lawyers face that inhibits their relationship building marketing. It’s that their ‘ego’ which doesn’t want to hear the word ‘no’ rules the roost. And the ego provides many good reasons to avoid ‘no’. So the lawyer who wants to market more needs some ‘workarounds’.

The first workaround was to Make Marketing A Time Management Policy; the second was to Be An Evangelist For Yourself; the third was to Set Targets for the Number of Contacts you Make each Day; the fourth was to Focus Your Marketing On People You Want To Do Business With. Last workaround

Build Your Self-Esteem.

I can’t fool you. Marketing yourself is tough. You’re going to get lots of rejection. That will affect your self-esteem until you get used to it and know how to build yourself up. Here are some things you can do to build your self-esteem.

Create a victory list and carry it with you. A victory list is just that. It is a list of the victories you have had in your life. What are your accomplishments that many others haven’t had. Don’t minimize graduating, marrying, parenting, gaining clients initially, getting a job, winning something and having the respect of someone special. Put your list of victories on a small card and carry it in your wallet. Look at it and edit it from time to time. The fact is that human beings are created to be cautious. It aids survival. Not everyone. Just almost everyone. Your victory list can help you flood your mind with positives and feel good about yourself.

Learn to reward progress not just perfection. In fact, it is best to plan to progress in many small steps. Chunk tasks and projects into small parts and set mini-milestones for yourself. Every time you finish a chunk or reach a milestone you’ll get a sense of satisfaction. Have enough of these and your self-esteem will rise. Do volunteer work with a children’s charity.

Review your goals every morning when you wake up, so that you’ll be more likely to focus on goal directed activity during the day.

Hang around people who pump you up. This is more than just staying away from negative people. This is actually going out and finding friends who really respect you and pump you up. Think of it as a mutual admiration society. If this sounds phony to you set it up as a goal-setting support group. That’s a group that meets regularly to help each other focus. It’s like rent-a-cheerleader.

The last way to build your self-esteem to pursue a passion. Select something you want to achieve and then devote some time every day towards achieving your goal. Make it a big goal with measurable returns. I play golf. Every day I spend some time doing something that will lower my golf score. Choose something. Decide to be passionate about it. Then do it with some passion.

Chances are you know someone who does the same work you do who is making a ton more money and having a great deal of fun doing it. I believe the secret of your success is somewhere in the five ideas I have laid out in these articles.

Good luck and good marketing.

Jerome Shore is an Executive Coach in Toronto, Canada. Clients to look to Jerome for help with Marketing, Leadership and Stress Management. He can be reached at coach@coachingclinic.com or 1-416-787-5555.